On the Road from KY to IL

Hello people of the light, we are on the road from KY to IL, early in the morning buzzing with locusts, sheltered by clouds and smelling like toasted bagels. We just passed a Waffle House, how cold.

Last night is memorable for several reasons, not the least of which was Andy Andrews’ summation of what’s going on in this country, and of course, the world. “Bullsh*t!”, he cried out. Bless your heart, Andy, there is so much to say, but really more to do, so just simplify the matter in a word and rev up your engines. As Dashiell says, “vroom vroom!”

These shows are getting more and more surprising, the people coming are either new, or familiar but different, as I must be. The tension between “I don’t know these people but I’m gonna sing what I feel under threat of desertion” and, “I’ve seen these people before, I wonder how they’re gonna react to me now” makes for good stuff.

The musical is being workshopped at the end of Sept, they’re casting the reading now, I’ve started working with the MD, I’m writing and rewriting in earnest. There are new songs now to glue onto the album, I think the title should change, and when I asked Gigi when are the lawyers gonna get the deal done so I can release this mother she said, “I’ll get it closed next week. I’m going to be wild.” Good on ya, mate.

I suppose its “healthy” for Dash that I leave and he has the opportunity to feel his independent life and tap into his sense of security in the bigger, spiritual sense, which he has in abundance, it seems, and its good for me to be without him and trust he’s doing well, physically and emotionally. But it’s a struggle. Especially because he understands what’s going on when I talk to him about going away, and he seems to resolve himself to be strong. It was said to me that he doesn’t want me to be upset, which could be true, and I cannot fathom that I have been given such a great and profound gift as my child. The other thing that amazes me is when I call and talk to him he has so much to say, and I realize when I hang up that I only got half of it in the moment. Is it always gonna be like that? Am I going to think about my conversations with him and realize more and more layers? It is like walking away from a great painting that lives and grows in you, or a poem, or a being who makes you expand. I also realized on the plane that I am continuing my journey, and mine is supporting his. And so soon he will take off on his destiny and I’ll be holding onto every moment of him, as I do now. I see corn, and horses, and I have a new appreciation for excavators, trucks and buses.

See you soon,

Sophie B.